Why is it?

I have a question, that I'm pretty certain, people will continuously come up with many analogies for, that may or may not make sense, but I'm going to ask anyway.

Why is it that a person, Man or Woman, has to LOSE a person to fully understand how much that person meant to them? As soon as a person gets left with in days, or even hours, suddenly realization strikes how much they took for granted the person who adored and loved them. I don't understand why people cant appreciate and see how much a person loves them by the things they do daily.

Why is it that people don't understand all the good things their spouse brings to the table until they stop bringing it?

Been Treated Like Shit? That's Because You Allowed It!

Disclaimer: I know this blog may upset a few, however, this is just my opinion.

If someone is taking advantage of you.... IT'S BECAUSE YOU ALLOWED THEM TO! Yes, you. No one can do anything to you unless you allow them to. No one can upset you unless you give them the power to do so. 

I'll give you a perfect example. Matter fact ill use my own prior situation as an example. I was dealing with a guy for a few years. I would always complain to my friends about how he wasn't treating me the way I wanted to be treated, how he continuously messed with other females, and the list goes on. All that time I would be mad at him and blaming him for my unhappiness, when I needed to blame the person in the mirror. 

I was the one who continued to mess with him though I wasn't happy and it was ME  who stayed after I found out he was talking to other females. I allowed him to get away with treating me the way he did, which led him to believe it was acceptable. By the time i said "enough is enough" it was too late.

If someone is treating you bad, don't expect that you can change them. People usually only change for themselves. If your love, time, and affection isn't enough for whomever to treat you the way you deserve to be treated, then they don't need to be a part of your life. 

There are three MAJOR components that you should acknowledge:

1. Specify how you want to be treated from the beginning. 

Being clear and concise will set a foundation and create a mutual understanding. There will be no preconceived notions and no presumptions. You could save your time and possibly someone else's.

2. Treat people the way you want to be treated. 

You can't possibly believe that you can treat someone bad and/or disrespectful and think they're going to treat you good and with the utmost respect. Usually people give you back the energy you dish out. Why would you treat anyone in a way you wouldn't want to be treated?

3. Treat yourself the way you want others to treat you. 

This is very important. If you don't respect yourself no one else will either. No one will treat you better than YOU. However you present yourself people will treat you accordingly. If you don't care about you, who will?

In short don't blame the bullshitter, blame yourself for continuously accepting the bullshit. You can't keep saying all men/women ain't shit. Stop dealing with people who treat you like shit. 

PreciousTruthz

You can leave a comment below or you can email at PreciousTruthz@gmail.com 

More Than Friends

From the beginning I knew that you would breathe life back into me. I knew that you would somehow show me that happiness is within arm’s reach and you would teach me friends could become more. As a friend you are everything I could ask for. You listen to me when I just need to be heard, when you ask me “what’s wrong” I know you’re actually concerned. You’ve provided for me and asked for nothing in return. I have learned that there are actually men who aren’t only interested in receiving. It’s actually relieving to know that good men do exist and it’s flattering that you insist I give you updates if I’m the slightest bit of sick. You give me strength when I’m not alright and I feel like I’m in a ditch. You always hold it down when I throw my little fits. I feel like the light in your eyes could lead me through my darkest days and the depth of your voice could save me from myself. I was enslaved by insecurities. I always thought it was something wrong with me but you came and showed me that I’m pretty and I’m smart. That I’ve stolen a piece of your heart and that I’ll always be a part of you and that’s something. From the beginning you haven’t fronted. You knew I was what you wanted and you pulled me in. Never stressed a dividend, you’re willing to share your all with me. It’s a blessing to be able to call you my friend and I hope this blossoms into much more in the end.

Precious Truthz

Can you handle the truth?

The truth is always a hard pill to swallow but I followed my heart and spoke the unspeakable. How unbelievable that must have sound to your ears. Your fears came alive, eyes threatening tears, tears that may show a trace of your hurt. As you stare into space, This unfamiliar place seems unreal and the taste your gagging on urges you to spew how you feel. You know what my intent was not but you're having a hard time trying crop out the negative thoughts....so what will you do pursue love, or allow love to be lost?

Drowning

My heart leaks below me creating a pool of my own feelings and with a SPLASH, im sinking, life stroking, thinking, How can i swim my way back to top so I can take that sweet breath of simplicity. I promised myself I would do things differently. To live a life without the heart taking, promise making, and the wage staking. I refuse to drown again in love left to soak in misery and a pool of my own blood. I cant take that risk of optimistically reattaching myself to that erotic anchor. That so wiskfully drags me to the pit of the beast, who feasts, on my heart opening up every part, flooding me with the need for all that touchy feely stuff, where i give my all and its never enough. Everything about my heart is so tough. My mind never wins, its like the oxygen in my brain gets thin cause the shits always losing time and time again. So I drown once more gasping and losing everything i've fought for. With every gulp of fluid my single life dies and love is born. I tried to be strong but i was taken by storm. And scared shitless about what this might become but i guess i wont know untill the damage is done. When it comes to that crazy love everyone gets a turn I guess I had to face the 3 L's; Live, Love, and Learn.

Truth Be Told: Are You Thirsty?

Today I was emailed, by a friend of mine, a blog titled "Dying of Thirst". I immediately thought he was going to discuss all the "thirst" that is claimed to be going around on fb, twitter, Instagram, etc. I assumed he was going to write about how people seem to be willing to lick their phone screen when they see certain things. Though his blog did touch upon that, the magnitude of the blog was about what thirst REALLY is. Hell I didn't know I was thirsty until I read his blog. I was so astounded that I was inspired to write about a personal experience AND start blogging again (Thank you Anthony Hill aka Renaissance Brotha).

One of the things that caught my attention in R.B.'s blog and established the fact that I too have been thirsty was when he stated "We all want love, but the moment you lower your values, sacrifice your morals, and sell your soul just so you can say, “he’s mine”, you become the worse kind of thirsty. Show a girl something she can’t have and watch how quickly the thirst sets in. If he has someone, if he’s not looking to settle, or any obstacle that makes a relationship with him nearly impossible, then that challenge is a turn on and his unavailability becomes thirst inducing" Dammit, he hit home.

That's when i realized I was in a situation where the thirst was real for me. I absolutely knew that he, who will not be named, was in all aspects not ready for commitment and could not be in a relationship. Do you think that hindered me from pursuing him? hell no!! In fact it encouraged me to want to "go hard" to make him mine. I enjoy a challenge, because usually when you take on something challenging and successfully get through it, it's that much more meaningful. However, this usually isn't the case when it comes to starting and continuing a relationship. Nonetheless, at that moment I wasn't thinking sensibly and I took on that "challenge". I was so thirsty for his attention that the little attention he gave me was, for some reason, sufficient. I was doing everything possible to prove to him I was worthy of his commitment. I was cooking, I was sexing, I was buying things, I was his confidant, always there when he needed help, and every time he called I would run! However, none of that mattered. He still told me he wasn't ready for a relationship, even though he was getting relationship benefits. It was then that I should have realized this didn't start how I wanted and it wasn't going to end how I wanted.

How many of you have heard the line "every man wants a good girl that is bad just for him and every girl wants a bad boy that is good just for her"? I have heard it numerous times. I even said I wanted that type of relationship. I was super hyped when MJB dropped that Mr. Wrong song. "Bad boys ain't no good!!! Good boys ain't no fun!!" I would sing (scream) those lyrics like a fool and you couldn't tell me anything. In all actuality, I wasn't even listening or digesting what she was saying. At least not intelligently. How am I getting along with someone so good, that breaks my heart so bad? *side eye* When did this become come the epitome of a perfect relationship anyway? Maybe we're too enthralled in Celebrity relationships.

I had to learn that if and when a man is ready to be in a relationship, he will have no problem stating and showing it. We as women need to stop trying to force a relationship on men. I'm not saying don't address the fact that you want to be in a relationship. A lot of times problems start because things aren't made clear. You would save your time and others if you would make things clear in the beginning. My main point is ADHERE to your standards and wait for someone who will express and show that he wants you the WAY you want to be wanted. I read recently "it doesn't matter how good of a women you are, if a man isn't ready." This statement spoke volumes. You can cook, clean, fuck, suck, have a job, education, etc but that doesn't mean anything to a man who does not want to be committed.

In short if a man or woman tells you they don't want to be committed for any reason, BELIEVE them. Don't take it as a challenge. Don't let the Thirst get you in to a situation that could possibly leave you disappointed in yourself. "IF YOUR INVESTING IN A RELATIONSHIP THAT'S GOING NO WHERE...IT'S LIKE EXPECTING WATER FROM A DRY WELL.YOUR EITHER GONNA MOVE ON TO SOMETHING BETTER..OR REMAIN THIRSTY AS HELL!!!"


Please feel free to comment or email me at PreciousTruthz@gmail.com